The Grass Is Greener On Your Side

Are you located anywhere near a mirror? If so, great. Go ahead and walk over to that mirror. Look into it. Look at yourself. Take in the shape of your eyes, their color, the size of your nose, the curve of your lips. Study your hair, and the way it moves when you tilt your head. Notice the things that make you unique; take a moment to truly see each freckle on your skin, every scar. Are you wearing earrings, glasses, or a hat? How would you describe the texture of your clothing? Pick one element of your physical self to tune in with. Select your eyes, perhaps, or your legs, or your stomach. Allow yourself to think freely about the part of yourself you have chosen; ponder what you like or dislike about your eyes, think about how you wish your legs were taller or shorter, about whether or not your stomach is growling with hunger. Any thought is welcome at the moment. Let them rush through your mind like an ocean wave; free to flow and continue, before breaking at the shore, and you move on to the next thought.

Now, reflect on the thoughts you have just had about your physical self. About your body. How many of them were happy? How many ideas did you have about how beautiful your eyes are when they catch the sunlight, or about what wonderful things those eyes have seen? And during your musings, how many negative notions did you have? Did you contemplate things you wish were different about your body? Do you wish for a flatter stomach or stronger arms or a six pack? Did you come to the conclusion that your eyes are too close together, or that you are too small, or that you are flawed in some other way? And permit me to ask - how many of your total thoughts were negative like these?

I'd be willing to bet, my friend, that most of your time spent reflecting on your body was negative. That you put yourself down far more than you complimented yourself or chose to love parts of yourself that aren't perfect. Because, you see, we are human beings. And human beings crave something that is entirely impossible. Something that they will work for and wish for, and something that will consume their every thought. Perfection.

When you get a poor grade on your math test, do you feel optimistic because you know that with a growth mindset, you'll do better next time? Probably not. It is more likely that you are incredibly disappointed in yourself and slip into an abyss of despair. Okay. Perhaps that was hyperbole. But you certainly won't be pleased that you flunked an exam, now will you? If you go the gym and see the guy next to you bench pressing twice the amount of weight that you can, you're first feeling is not going to be inspiration. It's going to be that you are so weak compared to him, that you will never be as strong as him; and there might be a little dash of jealously sprinkled in there, too. You see a beautiful girl at swim practice, and you think that you aren't, and will never be, that pretty. You see your friend's new car and are envious. Your coworker gets promoted, and although you put on a facade of glee, you are sad that it wasn't you who got the higher position. This is how the world works, everyone. No one feels good enough. We are riddled with doubt, plagued with envy, and lost in a head space of negativity. As the saying goes, the grass is always greener on the other side.

But the thing is, the world doesn't have to work like that. You don't have to wake up everyday only to hate what you see in the mirror. You don't have to feel inferior to others, or act superior to your peers. You can stop pretending to be perfect, because as we all know, perfection is not a human quality. In the words of Amy Adams, "The illusion of perfection is an illusion anyway." The grass can be greener on your side. If you cherish yourself, for everything that you are, nourishing your own fantastic traits, abilities, and opportunities, you can cultivate the life that you want. Our time on this Earth is short, and there is no point putting ourselves down. Every second matters; go ahead and count to three for me. One, Mississippi. Two, Mississippi. Three, Mississippi. Consider this: you will never get those three seconds of your life back. Because of this, it is so vital that we spend every moment we have, every breath we take, everything we do, with joy, curiosity, and love. Looking at the bigger picture, would you like to spend a good fraction of your life telling yourself you aren't good enough? Probably not.

So here is today's take away, dear reader. You are incredible. I admire you, because life is hard, it is so easy to feel worthless, and yet you are here. You are reading my blog post, with your eyes, and that is a miracle. You are a miracle. Life is a miracle. Self-confidence doesn't blossom overnight, but I challenge you to work toward loving and caring for yourself. It won't be simple (I can promise you that), but as soon as you begin to realize that you deserve everything the world has to offer, I can nearly promise that your life will change forever. The grass will be greener on your side.

Have a marvelous rest of your day, everyone!
- Maya

Photo by Fauzan Saari on Unsplash, Photo by Victor Garcia on Unsplash,
Photo by Edgar Pereira on Unsplash, Photo by Shifaaz shamoon on Unsplash,
Photo by Jason Leung on Unsplash